Blog 15 – Things my boys said that I will remember forever.

Before we go any further with this week’s Blog. I wish to apologize profusely. I have just glanced back on BLOG14 – Lockdown. And the blady worst is I have no doubt, in fact I am surer than blady sure there are more in my previous blogs? (Damn, damn, damn – especially if my ex-tutor Ginny is following my blog – yikes – sorry Ginny) I hear you ask: “What is Dizabeth being a drama queen about now?” Well dearest readers three blady words! Frikken spelling errors. (Typo’s too). I promise you all, I do check, check, re check and eventually I am reading but not seeing the words as weak as that may sound. I swear it’s the truth! I, as they say, “cannot see the wood for the trees”. The huge faux pas I saw immediately this evening yet didn’t see it when editing, re-editing and frikken editing again. Panick WTF??!! So, so, sorry dear readers I am the first to admit my grammar isn’t always the greatest but frikken hell, I do like to think my spelling is up to scratch …. well, most of the time! (Hey Michelle😊).

Okay so with apologies done, let’s get on with this week’s blog. Things my kids did and said that I will remember FOREVER! (Unless I suffer from Alzheimer’s or Dementia☹ please God – No!!) I have an amazing friend, she goes back, way back in my Book of life. When Chad was born, she bought me a beautiful notebook and on the cover was the title of this week’s blog. I treasured that notebook the day I received it and I treasure it today. Thank you, Mrs. Jackson. 😊

How cute is the cover?

There are five and half years between Ryan and Chad. I don’t know if I have ever shared this – Gary didn’t want children. It was unbelievable, we attended engagement classes. How to not leave the toothpaste lid off, how to not do this or ensure you do do that. Maybe you consider doing this but rather check with your better half before doing the other thing – blah blah blah and so it went. BUT they never ever discussed whether you both wanted children. They warned us never go to bed angry with one another, and whilst talking about bed – remember how important the bed is – and what occurs in the bed – starting with an S. No, no not that!!! Sjoe, where are your blady minds, take them out the gutter. I meant smooch and sleep – definitely NOT snore!!!  So yes, Gary did not want children. When Ryan was born, at the tender age of two weeks – yip two weeks he developed (intro scary music ….) colic! Oh, my word it was horrendous. That is until we found Bennett’s. Wow it was amazing muti. Anyhow, so him being a colic baby certainly didn’t help the cause and hence the five- and half-year age gap between Ryan and Chad. However today they are both here regardless of the age gap and I am forever thankful that they are my gorgeous boys. As I always say they are truly My Everything. So, this week is dedicated to them and my precious memory book.

We will start off with Ryan – he and I were obviously extremely close I was fortunate enough to stay home until he was 18 months. (Now just editing it sounds like I wasn’t close to Chad – which for the records I was and still am 😊)I then returned to work however always half day. (I know how lucky and blessed was I). I have shared in previous blogs my dearest friend, Nikki. We met at clinic, and she had Luke and Kaleigh. Before I FINALLY got my license Nik’s, and I would push our prams to the Botanic Gardens for a crumpet with the works. We truly have some amazing memories of those younger years with the three little ones. Anyhow once again I am digressing, as this is about what the kids said and did not how many frikken times we walked to the Bot Gardens for a yummo crumpet.

 Footnote time: On the subject of those crumpets with the works, the works was gallons of syrup with 2 gallons of fresh fluffy cream – so yip you can imagine the pounds one could pack on – but two reasons why I never did. When Ryan was born – literally within six weeks I was Twiggy thin – I know right!! I could eat anything (and trust me I did!) and I wouldn’t put on weight. My mother-in-law would go on and on, in fact, everyone went on and on about my weight. I used to think Whatever! You just jelly belly (jealous) because I lost all my baby weight and am so adorably thin. In reality;  to the naked eye – in fact anyone else’s eye BUT MINE!) I was sickly thin and had frikken bug eyes. I swear they were revoltingly buggy. Turns out I had a thyroid problem and that was the reason for the wonderous weight loss!

Ryan the big brother with Chad days old.

Hmm, I am sitting here pondering on exactly how to write this week’s BLOG. I guess story by story hey? I always waffle on and on and now I am thinking. How the heck do I waffle on this week? Now what I am meaning by waffle is that each story each Blog kind of flows into the other, so I guess this week I will write by sharing each thing they said – one at a time dearest Dizabeth. 😊

I can’t say the first story that “comes to mind” as I have bragged about my book – so let me page through it and share my stories….

Ryan

When Ryan had a runny tummy – he would always say: Mom I have flat poohs OR he would say he had melted poohs! When he was nervous – he felt “dizzy in his tummy”. Okay so I am already thinking perhaps this could be a boring subject…. We as Mama Bears all have our own “ah cute” stories hey?  Shucks I am really feeling a bit betwixed and between here …. Okay let me press on and truly hope this isn’t a boring blog ☹

Ok, decision made, I will share the funny stories – not what Ryan said – or what Chad said, I imagine it is actually pretty boring hey? It’s not as if they were your kids and yip, we all have our “what they did stories” so for now I will put them aside and share the funny stories. (Ah thank you I hear you all sigh with relief.)

We had returned from a family holiday to Cape Town, driving home from the airport Gary asked Ryan if he had had a good time and if he would be sharing his holiday news with all his “China’s in his class” – Ryan gave Gary a sideways glance and replied nonchantly  “Dad there is only one China in our class – her name is Jennifer” …. Now I do certainly hope this story won’t be considered as a racist one – it’s actually a truly cute “out of the mouths of babes” if we all honest and keep life refreshing – agreed? Agreed!

Then there was the time – Ryan and I were driving – not too sure where and I laughed (Not that it matters where the heck we were driving hey dear reader). He gasped and said “Mom! When you laugh you get such stripes on your face!” …. Frikken hell and that was back in the day when I was still a spring chicken. Can you imagine what my grandson will be thinking one day *yikes maybe he already thinks it!!) when I laugh. Jeez O Johnny look at nan’s frikken crevices when she laughs!”

I recall the day I was chatting to a friend and asked when next she would be travelling – she replied:  “It all depends on finances”. On the way home – after obviously quietly pondering. Ryan asked why my friend had to depend on flying ants before travelling.  Whilst talking about the rugby one day – Ryan was calling out all the Sharks players – innocently he called out the names and amongst them was “The Ghost Westhuizen. (Cabous van der Westhuizen).

A precious weekend away at Hluluwe with dad the braai master.

Chad

When Chad was still a preschooler at Christopher Robin – it was the first week of the new school year, I had fetched both boys. As we drove home, I asked how their day had been. Chad was quite a mischievous little boy. So I asked had he been good – he didn’t answer. I repeated the question, to which he resignedly replied, “Mom I am tired of talking now”. Guess he had had another mischievous day 😊. Shucks I remember when I used to fetch him from school everyday – I swear – everyday the teacher would say “Do you know what Chad did today?” I recall the one day I was in a “delightful” mood and I drove to the school mimicking her “Sooooo I wonder what Chad did today???”

I recall the day – Chad was obsessed with motorbikes as a youngster. Now you will recall just last week I was sharing just how lazy Gary is, well here is further proof! Chad and I were chatting and as he loved off road bikes so much, I asked which he preferred if he could ride one. To which he replied, “well mom because dad hasn’t taken off my trainer wheels I cant even ride a bike properly – so how will I ever be able to ride a motorbike?” I swear dear readers. Yip, you all know what is coming next. That very day I hoiked out the blady spanners and took those damn training wheels off! To the absolute delight of little Chaddy Boy. He was soon riding a motorbike. Albeit a blady pink one. I know!!! A work colleague was selling one and it was a blady good price – so we put our pennies together to buy Chad his first motorbike – even if it was pink😊. In fact just thinking now, last Christmas we bought Tide his first bicycle – it was in a box  – on Christmas day Ryan erected the bike and yip you guessed it was pink. When we watched the video of him and his bike it was Chad who with a despondent tone asked “Why did you buy him a pink one ma?” Clearly, he was affected by his pink motorbike! Thinking now Ryan said he would take it and exchange for a blue one – hmmm wonder if he ever did?

One particular day Chad wasn’t feeling well so obviously I let him stay home with our maid. When I returned from work, I asked Chad how he was feeling. He was watching Cartoon Network and I asked had he slept at all to which replied, “No mom, I forgot to!”

Another time I was home sick, Oh my giddy aunt I felt dreadful. I was lying on my bed, Chad was also not 100s so he stayed home too. I put the TV on and retired to my room to wallow in self-pity. After a while Chad came through and said “Ma I wish the faces on the TV would talk back to me.” Yip, you guessed, I hoiked my blanket, pillow and myself pity self and lay like a sloth on the couch in front of the TV with my little chap :).

I recall the day Chad had a friend over to play. They were pumping under their arm pits. Making “farting” sounds. I overheard Chad saying to his little friend “Keaton my real farts are going to get so jealous because I am so good at making fart noises!”

What about the day – I always, in fact to this day, I talk to my plants. The one day as I chitty chatted to my plants Chad joyfully asked “Mom, its ok if I talk to my toys hey – as you talk to your plants?”

The last story I will relate was as I prepared dinner for the boy’s, I went to check on them in the bath. Approaching the bathroom, I heard Chad asking Ryan what was for dinner. To which Ryan replied, “Some animals bum.” I was making a Boston Butt!

So, my dear readers, I cannot lie – I am this week feeling pretty concerned at the subject choice I have made this week. I truly am hoping it isn’t too “weak” as I say I would really hate for all my beloved readers to be thinking: Ah for Pete’s sake Dizabeth, what are we doing relating these precious to us Mama Bear stories that aren’t really that “precious” if they aint your own kids – see what I am getting at here dear readers? I do hope you have enjoyed this week’s BLOG.

Now as I wrap up, I need to apologize in advance. I know! Frikken beginning and ending the BLOG with apologies. However as of this Thursday (the 23rd September – I am flik flaking across my lounge as I type this – I know, I know… how the hell could I possibly be doing cartwheels across the lounge whilst I type – well its blady obvious hey – I am not really doing cartwheels!  But I need to apologize and ask you my dear reader to please excuse me for the next week (or two) … we are attending a family wedding nnnnnneeeeeeeexxxxxt weekend – sooooo this week we are all going to meet up and spend the week as a family together before heading off to the wedding. I know – frikken amazing hey! Truly very, very, frikken vvvvvveeeeerrrrrry excited to see my boys. Promise I will listen closely to their convo’s, and I will be sure to share with you anything witty they may say that I want to remember forever.

Hey, shucks next week our dearest Ryan turns 30! Yikes Happy Happy 30th my precious angel – love you GAZILLIONS.

Please stay safe, healthy and blessed.

Thanks for believing in me and for being so frikken awesome.

Take care

Mwah mwah