Blog 26: Tis the season ……

I realise not everyone is as enthusiastic about the Christmas season and all those overly fat men dressed in red that are bobbling along and saying “Ho Ho Ho” repeatedly as they laugh, as I am. In all honesty for me it’s really the vibe I love (that as well as the fat men together with the colour red!) Interesting question, whilst on the overly fat men dressed in red. I wonder what the heck they are laughing at. I do need to add at this point, I understand that feeling when you walk out the shop and your credit card is less than it was when you walked into the blady shop – I ask in all seriousness how do you carry on with a Ho!Ho!Ho! Although saying that, when it comes to our loved ones, we all do go the extra mile. So today I am going to share some of my extra mile moments.

The overly fat merry man will all love to love. Be it Santa or Father Christmas.

The other day Gary and I were in a shop and saw lucky packets. Now I am not sure, hmm I don’t think it is a lucky “packet” as such. It’s that box, remember you get the boy one and the girl one.  Bright red has reindeers and that overly fat man dressed in red all over it. Well, the memory flooded back, I saw myself as a little girl, I felt the thrill and excitement of the day my mom (actually, I think it was my gran?) We caught the bus into town to (yip was definitely my gran!) Greenacres to join the other boys and girls meet Father Christmas (Santa? Who frikken knows – I never know what you supposed to say as when I say Santa, I can imagine Sol Kerzner, remember when he would start a conversation with an American accent and then it would become a South African accent!!) Anyhow, I remember that – do you remember the fairy that would come and collect you and take you to that overly fat man dressed in red. Now, this is also a bit hazy. Did you walk to him with the fairy? I am so sure that you went on a little train – through Toyland etc., Who has a clearer memory than me? Shucks I do recall as clear as day, my dad had his own company. I doubt I would have “happily” volunteered for this? But someone dressed up as Santa – hmmmm now who was that? But anyhow I remember I was the fairy. I can remember (vaguely) being so frikken disinterested although I am sure there was a vested interest in being the fairy – probably got paid by dad! I went through a phase where I had short, I am gonna throw myself under the bus here – punk hairdo short and spikey and heavy, heavy eye liner. My God I bet the parents battled to get the kids to sleep after that fairy visited – shit they must have thought they had stepped into a 101 Dalmations – minus the Dalmations and only Cruela DeVil was there (yip that being me!) Anyhow, back to Christmas shopping.

Dizabeth – The Christmas fairy NOT!

I do keep wondering to myself – what will we get in future years for our little chap Tide? He is only 2 and half and this year in particular – nope just thinking back – we did it last year as well. We buy him stuff that is a bit too advanced – last year we bought him a biycle. No, not a TRIcycle. Hm good question? I think there were training wheels – cannot remember.  I do remember though it was in the box and Gary and I – we frikken bought him a pink one! So, yip the hassles they must have had taking it back – joining the queue with those that are swopping out their presents that they were “oohhhhin and aahhing about as they unwrapped it” Oh my word – this is GORGEOUS AND JUST what I wanted” (Yeah right!) As they casually look all over hoping that the price is still on it – or somewhere on it there is a hint of where it was bought. This year we have bought him a trainset, a scale electric and various little toys. I know right! By the time he is 21 we will be buying him his own country! Hm now there’s a good idea – and when we do, obviously Nan will of course go live with him wherever it may be.

I do believe as I mentioned earlier, we may not have the biggest amount of cash in the bank but when it comes to our children, we all do try go the extra mile. I recall as a little girl my folks would always buy a few little gifts for us to open and then the present from Santa (Father Christmas??) was the last one. Some of my Santa (ok going forward in this blog it’s easier to type Santa so Santa it is😊) presents that I totally loved were a set of roller skates, remember the ones with the wheels and you would wear your shoes and slip the roller skates over them and then strap them on. You could adjust them to your shoe size. They were so cumbersome and cluckerty cluck (remember my mom thinking one of the Gods she had read about was visiting her: Blog 4 Fantastical Fantasy). Another favourite was the character from Noddy – it is no longer called what it was back then but oh my word I loved my gollywog so much. I recall him with such fondness. I remember I always wished for but never received a ragdoll. To this day I always take a minute more just to look at them in the shops. As I matured, I have been blessed with some amazing presents. One Christmas I remember Gary bought me a beautiful gold locket. I left it on the mantlepiece as we were all swimming and when I came to get it a little later – “someone” had obviously tried to see if it was 9ct gold and had bitten into it! Family! To this day I know exactly whom that horrid person was. Gary’s dad would always play Father Christmas – it was his role to read out the gift tag as it was handed over to the person. I will never forget the first year – it became a bit stale in the years that followed if I am honest as every year Gary did the same – he wrote on my card “To my bitchen from hell….” Well Gary’s dad needless to say could hardly breathe he was laughing so much as he read it out! Now dear readers we all know what a true delight I am – so it really was an unfair reflection of his beloved wife – don’t you agree!

Anyhow huge digression there Dizabeth – let’s get back to Christmas for the boys. I would always – until Ryan clearly outgrew this. I would lather (ruined) baby powder on Gary’s work shoes making footprints of Father Christmas (really Dizabeth in that humid sweltering heat of Durban! It would have been waaaaaay more realistic if I had just chucked puddles of water from the front door to the Christmas tree. The result, Ryan came stumbling through still sleepy and asked, “Who spilt baby powder everywhere?” (WTF!) Sadly, these days the only thing I use baby powder on is between my frikken thighs in the summer heat!!!

So, there was the year Chad was HUGELY into the ah shucks man – ahhhh that is it – The Telly Tubbies. He in particular loved the red one, Po – we got it for him for Christmas – and I swear to this day we have NO idea where it went – it was opened – loved for half a second before he ripped open his next present – and that was the sum total of him (Po) – he mysteriously disappeared. Hm the mysteries of Christmas Day’s past – who bit into Dizabeth’s gold locket? Who stole Po? Tune in next Christmas …..

Po – Telly Tubbies

Now Ryan he loved surfing – yip – you guessed, as you know we have never been the richest family to ever walk the earth! So, when Ryan wrote to Santa asking for a surfboard – we were a tad stressed. As much as we tried to sway his decision, he was adamant – a surfboard it was to be! Obviously never wanting to disappoint, Gary and I trawled – yip wait for this dear reader – we were that poor – we visited all the second hand surf shops! And we found one! Now I can still visualize this blady thing – yip “thing” oh my giddy aunt – it was frikken bashed and really, really tired! But we were chuffed – I can remember wrapping it – I would love to have been in Ryan’s thoughts that morning as he unwrapped this dilapidated surfboard; shame man – but sure as nuts – we took him to the beach, and it did the trick. Sjoe I can still see it though – my word it was sooooo tired!

I seriously am hitting a blank this morning – I cannot remember other Christmas favourites of the boys. I do know thought that each and every year we delivered what they had written to Santa asking for. It really was quite hectic for us – I recall as I have mentioned before we really tried and then there were other members of the family – my giddy aunt it was so totally, totally unnecessary – I remember dear reader the final year, the year we held up and waved our white flat and said “eeeeeeeeenough!”  – shucks it was probably the same year we proudly waited with bated breath as Ryan unwrapped his tired, dilapidated surfboard and as we tied up all the ripped wrapping paper I recall the boys cousins would receive that “wow” present! You know that one that just blew you, as a parent out the blady water. The one that made me think – “That’s me – time out! Timmmmmeeee blady out!”  The Trump card present so to speak – and that year both cousins received a Blackberry (yip that’s right – the cell phone – certainly not, as much as I had prayed it was the fruit – nope it was indeed the blady cellphone!) that was the final cherry on Dizabeth’s Christmas cake – the next year and all Christmases after that – we would only join the cousins after the present unwrapping ceremony had occurred. It wasn’t ever about sour grapes it was just so disheartening when you as a parent had tried your frikken best and there were the blady in laws with their fancy assed gifts!

This year I made various table decorations for my friends – no fancy assed presents! BUT made with heaps of love.  

This year we have our little Tide with us, we are very excited to see what Santa has delivered for him. I can assure you there are definitely no Blackberries nor Samsung’s. Nope just regular kids’ fun stuff – toys, toys and then more toys. Also, this year, the first time ever Chad will be across far away seas in the USA. Through the years, its almost as if it has been a time for him to learn that Christmas can be “just another day” if need be. Previous years he hasn’t been able to celebrate Christmas for various reasons – the one he had a shoulder op and was so doped up, another time he was working and this year he will have just started his contract at a golf estate in Florida, USA – but we certainly will raise a glass and cheer to him. Also, I will raise my glass to three extremely, extremely special friends in my life – Julie, Alex and Steven – this Christmas I raise my glass to you.

This nan sure is having heaps of fun coming up with ideas each evening as to what Elfie got up to whilst Tide was fasto’s (asleep). I am not entirely sure he is understanding the whole concept of Elfie – but never the less Nan sure is having heaps of fun – oh and good practice for the years to come when he is sure to understand the difference between being Naughty or nice and knowing that Santa is spying on him😊 Thanks dear, dear reader for your support, love, enthusiasm this year with my blog. May I take this opportunity of wishing each and every one of you a wonderful Holiday season and for those that are working – it hopefully will be quieter (eish not in the medical field☹) But know I am holding thumbs it is a little more restful even though you will be working. No matter where you are – know you are loved and remember to always be kind to you.

Take care

Merriest of Christmases to you and your specials.   Mwah mwah